1 simple skill to be more effective in writing and in life

Intellectual Banter: Episode #21

Welcome to the new members who’ve joined us recently. If you’re new or missed the last edition, catch up here. And thank you for giving me your time, I appreciate it.

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Hey!

I’ve been missing in action recently.

Reflecting on my writing journey and where I want to take it has been taking more time than I expected. I ended up not writing as a result.

Let’s rectify that with today’s simple lesson. It’s a skill I’ve been building in my writing. And more importantly, in my life.

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On my mind

Be direct.

It’s the backbone of effective communication. Once you’ve decided what to say, come right out and say it.

What’s the purpose of communication?

It’s to convey your thoughts to the other person accurately. To get them to understand it and then take the required action.

But how many of us actually do that?

I’m guilty of being a lifelong mumbler. I’ll fidget, beat around the bush and hint at what I want to say. Till the other person says - “yo, what’s up?”. Then I’ll get on with it. Even then, I’ll try to pad out my message to “soften the blow”.

Why do we mumble though?

Because we’re afraid of being too direct. It feels impolite. Rude, even?

Or it’s just a habit now. School and corporate life teaches you to say “more”. Pad out your answers in exams (I used to repeat the same shit endlessly to fill pages). Or make it sound fancy by using jargon no one understands (let’s take this off-line).

Regardless, it’s a waste of everyone’s time and energy.

Benefits of being direct (in writing and life)

1) Effective communication - what you want to say gets across. What you want done gets done. It’s the best use of time and energy for everyone.

2) Command respect - mumblers rarely command attention. “Uhh, I think you should try being direct, you know. Maybe, I dunno… it seems to make sense, what do you think?” Get it over with already (note to self).

3) Higher self-esteem - it’s the hallmark of a healthy individual. You can be direct when you’re not afraid all the damn time. You’re comfortable expressing your opinion, regardless of how it’s perceived (this is hard).

Simple way to be more direct (in writing)

I’ve always written better than I speak.

Likely due to my introverted nature (though I despise labels). Anyway, writing in a direct manner is “easier”. There’s a level of protection between you and your reader.

Here’s what you can do: Write and edit in different modes.

1. Write in a free flowing manner. Your goal is only to put words on the page. Zero editing.

2. Let it breathe for as long as you can. A few hours to a day.

3. Come back with a mission to cut things out. Be ruthless. Yes, that means your favorite clever phrase you spent 10 minutes obsessing over. And the 10 adjectives you’ve put there with it.

Also, use Hemingway. It’s spectacular for a quick check.

With that out of the way, I’m still figuring out how to be more direct in life. 

If you’ve never been direct before, doing so will make you physically uncomfortable. Shit takes a lot of work. But regardless of what you do, always remember:

Don’t mumble.

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Un-chuckle worthy quote

“If language is not correct, 

Then what is said is not what is meant; 

If what is said is not what is meant, 

Then what ought to be done remains undone.” - Confucius

Man, I love Confucius.

His wisdom rings true across centuries. Also, effective communication is the bedrock of getting anything done. So pay attention to it.

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Until next week

In the spirit of being direct, I’d love to know why you subscribed to this newsletter (or follow me on Twitter). I’m reflecting on my writing and the path I plan to take. 

So it’ll be helpful to me (and you) to get some feedback. Even one word replies count!

Your “trying not to mumble” friend,

Adi