The most important story ever told

Intellectual Banter: Episode #18

Welcome to the 18 new members of our tribe who have joined us since the last episode. If you’re new or missed the last edition, catch up here. And thank you for giving me your time, I appreciate it.

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Greetings, my friends!

Episode #17 of this email went out on 31 July 2022.

I’ve been on a writing hiatus since (the horror!). Not because I fell off the wagon, but because my wife and I welcomed our lil beanie baby girl into this world.

She’s ridiculously cute and has a voracious appetite (the little dragon).

To resume writing and rebuild my momentum, I’m sharing a rather personal email. About names, projecting meaning and the stories we ‌tell ourselves.

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On my mind

What’s the purpose of a name?

On a recent car ride, my 5-year-old nephew asked me why a certain bank was called what it was.

Being the smartass that I am, I asked back: “why is anything called what it is?” As you can see, I’ve a habit of asking age inappropriate rhetorical questions. That was a fun chat, though.

Rewind to eight months ago: my wife and I are pondering this question as we begin our quest to come up with baby names.

There are countless names in the world.

They vary across religion, culture, and countries. Much like the glamorous world of fashion, there are names that are “in” and “out” of fashion (whatever TF that means). And some are random ass permutations of each other. Regardless, they're all 100% made up!

So how do you pick “the one”?

For us, it’s about what the name signifies. The meaning it holds. And the story it tells.

Because life is a series of sensory experiences that we all project meaning to. As over-evolved apes, our brains are in the habit of always telling stories. The ones we tell others. The ones we craft and polish till they blind us with their brilliance.

But most importantly, the stories we tell ourselves. Then believe them to be THE TRUTH. And live them out.

I’m also a big believer in the placebo effect. Because life is a game of mindset. Everything you and I experience is inside our heads, tinted with the shade of our biased perception.

So I’ll take whatever help I can get to become a better player.

It’s for this reason that we latched on to literally the first name that my wife proposed for a girl (well done, m’lady). It “clicked”. 

Our daughter’s name means “the free one”.

It signifies two kinds of freedom. Freedom from this modern world’s imposed standards and shackles (“you must be this way!”). And freedom to do what she wants (“you need to do this!”). Unfortunately, she won’t have freedom from my nagging ass (or her obsessive mum). Though there’s still time for that irony to dawn upon her.

For the moment, she’s chill:

“Who’s Elira? I’m just a little bean”

So when she grows up and starts asking questions, this is what we’ll tell her.

She can then create her own narrative around it. One that will last her a lifetime. And hopefully will be a positive, empowering one. Something she can come back to when life gets cranky (as it tends to).

You and I are also telling such stories all the damn time. 

Your life is the most important story you’ll ever tell. So why not make it the best one you can?

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Un-chuckle worthy quote

"A good name in man and woman is the immediate jewel of their souls." - William Shakespeare

It’s the first gift we’ve given our daughter. Although we’ve yet to call her by it (nickname count: 17 and rising fast).

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Until next week

I’m going to be easing back into my new writing routine over the next few weeks. And thinking more about my message.

Have a wonderful week, my people!

Your “asks 5YO existential questions” friend,

Adi

PS: As always, suggestions are welcome. I love banter (duh), so ‌hit that reply button, comment on the website or book a call if you want to chat! I’d love to hear from you.