What changing diapers taught me about being a better writer…

Intellectual Banter: Episode #28

Greetings, my friend!

Here we are on the second last issue of Intellectual Banter.

If you’ve just joined, don’t worry - I don’t plan to stop writing. The PS at the bottom is for YOU.

So, becoming a pro at changing poopy diapers has also made me a better writer. Two things I never thought I’d put together in one sentence.

Here’s why…

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I’ve been a father for almost 4 months.

And aside from realizing how little sleep you can function on, I’ve noticed some surprising lessons about writing…

1/ Are you a writer or a diva?

I’ve got a stick up my ass for routine.

Since I began writing this January, I’ve studied prolific creators to learn and adapt their writing routines. Here’s what I came up with:

• Wake up at 5AM

• Go for a walk to freshen up

• Meditate, journal and then write

So I tried it - the results were great. But it took me over an hour to get prepped for writing.

But now?

My little bean wakes up around 7 AM, ready to play. After that, it’s time for her daily premium salon treatment - massage by mum and bath by yours truly. 

Then I grab a cup of black coffee, drop and do 10 push-ups and start writing.

And I write when I can.

Usually between changing diapers and trying to give my wife mini breaks through the day.

So stop being a diva.

Do what works, not what’s sexy.

2/ Find your purpose to write

Nothing makes you want to succeed more than staring into your child’s eyes.

Writing is a tough game.

Self-doubt and confusion are constant companions.

They keep whispering nonsense throughout. “This won’t work… WTF are you even doing?!“

Morons.

I’ve gotten stuck more times than I can count this year. My only motivation was to not go back to my job.

But now?

My motivation stares back at me daily with those beady, loving eyes and… 

“Agoooooo!”

There’s NO coming back from that.

She’s my reason to succeed.

As Nietzsche said:

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”

3/ You need to read more children’s fiction

I used to be a self-help junkie.

Reading non-fiction, non-stop.

But I’ve gone from that to reading Roald Dahl to my little girl every day.

I’d already read them many years ago, so I didn’t expect to notice new things this time around. 

But they’re:

• Crafted to arouse curiosity - why did a bathroom sink fall out the window?!

• Snappy and direct - unlike a certain newsletter you’re reading (*ahem*)

• Full of sharp transitions that pull you along - (But this happened… so that happened…) x infinity

The reason is simple:

Children’s fiction is meant to grab and keep attention. And it does the job well.

I look forward to reading the Harry Potter series to her. Time to analyze Ms. Rowling’s storytelling techniques.

Because frameworks are great, but great storytelling is better.

That’s all from me today.

See you next week for the final issue of Intellectual Banter. Have a great week and thanks for being along for the ride.

Your “change diapers to become a better writer” friend,

Adi

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PS: First, hello! Thanks for reading till the end (or skipping here, both work). Here’s why I killed Intellectual Banter and what it means for you and me going forward.

Second, it wouldn’t be fair to not write even one piece about being a father (and tie it to writing, of course). Hope you enjoyed this brief personal reflection.